VERBAL ABUSE (?)

read a comment from a former student on my friendster account which made me laugh until my stomach hurt, I'm reproducing it here:

"elo sir!musta na?heheheh!miss na miss na namun ang mga singgit mu sir!,,permi q guid gaka dumduman ang gin hmbal mu nga "ndi q bulag, ndi q bungol kag ndi q gago"hehehehe!take care olweiz and god bless u sir,hope to see u soOn!"

hahahaha seems that they had one aspect of my personality permanently seared into their brain...truth be told, I really exude an intimidating aura in my class most especially during the first few months of classes. If you're handling first year kids barely out of grade school, you really need to put them in their place once in a while. Unfortunately (for my students) I seem to be an expert at manipulating my vocal cords which enables me to throw my voice (a few decibels higher) at them like a fully-packed nuclear tipped ICBM whenever the need arises. A few instances where my "ability" comes in handy:

1. kanami sang discussion mo sang philippine revolution, may ga-revolution nga mga estudyante sa likod sang klase

2. after one whole week of discussion, you ask one student to recap the lesson and all you get is a blank stare...even worse, palagpat na ang answer, mahirihi pa na ang animal...(This actually happened in a fourth year class I handled, the unfortunate being that caught my ire went pale as a sheet of high quality laser print bondpaper but survived nonetheless. Then their adviser told me that the student-whom-i-chewed-up had a nervous habit whenever faced with anxiety-inducing situations (such as being asked to recite in class): uncontrollable giggling. Oooops... :P)

3. I am giving a 40 item test in my class and the the students in the classroom beside the one I'm in are going at it full blast kay absent ang ila dakilang teacher. If they were my students, one look ala yamato of naruto shippuuden would suffice. Pero kung wala pa sila ka-experience sa akon then the fireworks will start after three GENTLE (repeat gentle ha) reminders (in-english pa na ang reminders...and singgit teh mix na na sang ininggles kag ilonggo para may igo gid) -- i remember I once evicted two classes from their rooms for this sin...I was standing in the hallway barking at them to hurry and get out of my sight!)

4. whenever I am a proctor during exams and MY INSTRUCTIONS AREN'T FOLLOWED PROMPTLY AND TO THE LETTER. I turn into a real a**hole when that happens...

But despite my "bad habit" of screaming. I have never verbally abused a student. Although that unfortunate senior student was the catalyst for my high-decibel harangue, I first asked him to sit down before I began the fireworks. I have never used obscenities against a student. (though a well-placed "LINTI!" often does the job of a hundred-word essay of pangakig)

The "screamfest" is my last weapon -- kung sa voltes five pa kung indi makuha sa rocket, latigo kag electromagnetic top, ipagwa ang LASEEER SWOOOOOOORD!If after several (okay -- two) gentle reminders, the THIRD ONES gonna be a whopper.

And as a rule I keep my pangakigs short. I consider it a diservice to the rest of my students if I waste an entire period just to address the transgressions of one unfortunate soul. (who usually won't last until august in my subject *insert evil laugh here*)

My kids eventually figure out my pattern so after a few months, the whole class will immediately be quiet if even one syllable in my speech goes above my usual volume level. Usually after august, everything is fine and that's when I reveal my "lovable side" baw! hahahahahaha

miss gid ko nila kay daw naghipus na ang high school...or basi wala na may gasaway sa mga katuntuhan nila? (may ara ah, galing mas buot siya compared sa akon hehe)

to my kids: I miss you all, good luck sa studies, tuon mayo....

oh, by the way...

andaman niyo lang makabati ko sang katuntuhan niyo kay MALINTI-AN GID KAMO SAKON!!!!!!!